ByAngela Saunders
One thing is certain if you are reading this, you have, at some time in your life, found yourself single, alone and looking for someone to love. When you are part of the Lonely Hearts Club, you hope against all hope that you will finally meet someone who will fit the bill and bring you back to happiness again. So these days you are likely to go on-line and subscribe to a dating site, singles group or register in the personal relationships section of a newspaper or magazine.
You start out eagerly filling in your personal details and writing your profile. It proves to be much more difficult than you thought it would.
How to describe yourself without seeming arrogant, bigheaded, or just brash, is a nightmare exercise. The more modest amongst us struggle to write a paragraph not knowing what to put in and what to leave out, especially if they bring a sensitive, shy or self-conscious nature to the table. Sounding interesting can often turn into a list of dare-devil antics that could drive people away, so what is a person to do? Adding a photograph is fraught with dangers. Which one to choose? Many people are so self-conscious that they just leave them out. Others put up a photo of themselves which represents how they like to think of themselves, only you are left to find out that the photo was taken some twenty years ago when you finally get to meet.
Then there are those who fit the other extreme. Over confident, they sound so wonderful, have achieved so much. Secretly you feel that they just wouldnt want to know you unless you are able to match their characteristics and qualities. And yet, they look so good in their picture, So tanned, fit, and wonderful that you long to make contact, and do.
You are not surprised when they do not reply. This just feeds your feelings of low self worth and self-hatred and you give up trying for a while until the reminder that your membership is about to expire draws you back online again with the hope of better prospects ahead.
So, how can you shorten the odds and make meeting someone much more rewarding and successful? First of all, you need to build up your confidence by realising just what it is you have to offer someone, and learning how to get that across.
Next, you have to learn some rules about building charisma and developing rapport, so that every time you contact someone, every time you meet you can turn that event into a successful outcome, and your new found friendships into lasting relationships.
For example, when you put up your photo make sure that you are smiling. When you smile you show the most balanced aspect of your facial features and you look warm and friendly, do so with pride. It is very important, no matter what opinion you hold of yourself, to put a photograph up as part of your profile. Be proud of who you are. By putting up a photo you are showing that you are an honest, reliable person with nothing to hide. There are many people out there who look far worse than you do and have a lot less to offer. Make sure that your photo truly represents who you are today. It is a false vanity to use an old photograph and just not honest. You will drive people away when they meet you and give them a bad first impression of who you really are.
If you practice skills in knowing what to say and when to say it, what to do and when to do it, you will have a far greater success at building relationships. Everyone can learn how to choose a mate that is right for them, how to turn a conversation into a friendship and how to turn a friendship into a lasting relationship. All they need to do is know how.For detailed information on how to enjoy fantastic new relationships, read: VALENTINES FOREVER - 50 Ways To Meet And Keep Friends available at: http://www.relationshiphotline.com/webstore
Monday, February 26, 2007
For Men Only:7 Simple Secrets To Keeping The Fire Burning In Your Relationship Beyond Valentines Day
If Valentines Day was typical, the flower and candy industry will make up for most of their financial losses on this day. They will sell every gift and teddy bear the public can afford and in some cases can't afford. However what they will not tell you is that by purchasing that candy, those flowers, that bear you may in fact actually be destroying your relationship. It's not that those things are not good, they are.
The problem in so many relationships occurs a few weeks after Valentines Day. On Valentines Day, every woman observes what her husband or boyfriend is truly capable of romantically. The problem is that most men have no intention of keeping up that intensity level of romance. Why? Well, many men like feel as though it would be unreasonable to do so. For those men I offer 7 simple secrets to keep the fire in your relationship burning beyond Valentines Day.
Simple Secret # 1 Ask the Everyday Question
Ask the average man if women talk too much and he will happily say, "YES". The truth is though; most men do not realize that a woman's number two (2) need is communication. To keep the flame in a relationship burning, men must ask there wives about their day. Then shut up and listen...and listen...and listen...and listen.
Simple Secret # 2 Answer the Everyday Question
Tthe next step is to be prepared to answer the everyday question. If communication is truly a deep need for woman, it means men must have something to contribute to the conversation. Inevitably after applying simple secret #1, men will hear something like, "and how was your day". The temptation is to simply say "fine" or "okay" however to keep the flame burning, men must provide their wives with a detailed account of their day from the moment they awaken up to the moment he returned home from work. This is hard for men I know but it must be done.
Simple Secret # 3 Maintain a Steady Date Night
Listen up gentlemen. No woman dreams as a little girl that she will grow up to be a house wife that is taken for granted by her husband. She never wrote in her diary that her secret fantasy was to never see the inside of a nice restaurant except on her birthday, Valentines Day and her anniversary. To keep the flame in your relationship burning, you must establish with her and maintain a regular "date night" each week. Work with her and identify an evening where you will go out as you once did long ago. No one else is allowed to participate and no one else is allowed to break the established day and time of date night.
Simple Secret # 4 Put the Kids to Bed
Every woman I know gives a tremendous amount of energy to her kids, husband and job. A man, must be sensitive to the demands that are constantly placed on her. The average woman works between 15 and 17 hours per day. Factor in the efforts getting the kids ready for school in the morning, working all day, then helping the kids with their homework, cooking and serving dinner then putting the kids to bed at night, it's clear this fact to be true. To keep the relationship burning, at least once a week, take the initiative to get the kids ready for bed. Give them their bath, help them brush their teeth, read them a bedtime story, tuck them in and pray with them. Note: Kids may be shocked at your presence during bedtime but don't let that discourage you. Keep this up at least two (2) times a week.
Simple Secret # 5 Invest in a Bottle of Bubble Bath
While putting the kids to bed, what might your wife be doing? To keep the fire burning in, men must prepare a nice hot bubble bath. This will keep her in the bathroom away from the activities of the kids' preparation for bedtime. Prepare the tub, add the bubbles and run the water. Do not let her do any of this. This way, you can chase the kids around the house and get them to bed before she gets out of the tub. Note: An advanced secret is that after her bubble bath, offer her a massage.
Simple Secret # 6 Clean Up After the Kids
In my home, we fold clothes, wash dishes, vacuum, and make beds. Whatever it takes to lighten a wife's load, should be done. Keep the flame burning. Find every opportunity to become a burden bearer for that special woman. See the kids made mess in their room, don't walk around it. Take the initiative to clean up any mess before she does. Practice uncommon cleanliness and watch the difference it makes in a relationship.
Simple Secret # 7 Pay Attention Men true romance has nothing to do with flowers or candy at all. In fact true romance can be summed up in one simple phrase. To women, true romance means simply that as a boyfriend or husband are proactively meeting her unspoken needs. Serious about keeping the fire burning in your relationship? Become a student of that woman. Is she concerned about her weight. Why not invest in one of the many diet programs like,.ReviewofMedifast.com and participate with her. Discover all over again what she likes and doesn't like. Go to a restaurant and order a meal along with desert for her without her being there to tell you what she wanted? As a child what did she always want to be when she grew up? Really pay attention to her. Begin to listen and take notes if need be. Anticipate her needs, lighten her load and tell her how special she is. Do this and guarantee that the fire will continue to burn in long after Valentines Day.
The problem in so many relationships occurs a few weeks after Valentines Day. On Valentines Day, every woman observes what her husband or boyfriend is truly capable of romantically. The problem is that most men have no intention of keeping up that intensity level of romance. Why? Well, many men like feel as though it would be unreasonable to do so. For those men I offer 7 simple secrets to keep the fire in your relationship burning beyond Valentines Day.
Simple Secret # 1 Ask the Everyday Question
Ask the average man if women talk too much and he will happily say, "YES". The truth is though; most men do not realize that a woman's number two (2) need is communication. To keep the flame in a relationship burning, men must ask there wives about their day. Then shut up and listen...and listen...and listen...and listen.
Simple Secret # 2 Answer the Everyday Question
Tthe next step is to be prepared to answer the everyday question. If communication is truly a deep need for woman, it means men must have something to contribute to the conversation. Inevitably after applying simple secret #1, men will hear something like, "and how was your day". The temptation is to simply say "fine" or "okay" however to keep the flame burning, men must provide their wives with a detailed account of their day from the moment they awaken up to the moment he returned home from work. This is hard for men I know but it must be done.
Simple Secret # 3 Maintain a Steady Date Night
Listen up gentlemen. No woman dreams as a little girl that she will grow up to be a house wife that is taken for granted by her husband. She never wrote in her diary that her secret fantasy was to never see the inside of a nice restaurant except on her birthday, Valentines Day and her anniversary. To keep the flame in your relationship burning, you must establish with her and maintain a regular "date night" each week. Work with her and identify an evening where you will go out as you once did long ago. No one else is allowed to participate and no one else is allowed to break the established day and time of date night.
Simple Secret # 4 Put the Kids to Bed
Every woman I know gives a tremendous amount of energy to her kids, husband and job. A man, must be sensitive to the demands that are constantly placed on her. The average woman works between 15 and 17 hours per day. Factor in the efforts getting the kids ready for school in the morning, working all day, then helping the kids with their homework, cooking and serving dinner then putting the kids to bed at night, it's clear this fact to be true. To keep the relationship burning, at least once a week, take the initiative to get the kids ready for bed. Give them their bath, help them brush their teeth, read them a bedtime story, tuck them in and pray with them. Note: Kids may be shocked at your presence during bedtime but don't let that discourage you. Keep this up at least two (2) times a week.
Simple Secret # 5 Invest in a Bottle of Bubble Bath
While putting the kids to bed, what might your wife be doing? To keep the fire burning in, men must prepare a nice hot bubble bath. This will keep her in the bathroom away from the activities of the kids' preparation for bedtime. Prepare the tub, add the bubbles and run the water. Do not let her do any of this. This way, you can chase the kids around the house and get them to bed before she gets out of the tub. Note: An advanced secret is that after her bubble bath, offer her a massage.
Simple Secret # 6 Clean Up After the Kids
In my home, we fold clothes, wash dishes, vacuum, and make beds. Whatever it takes to lighten a wife's load, should be done. Keep the flame burning. Find every opportunity to become a burden bearer for that special woman. See the kids made mess in their room, don't walk around it. Take the initiative to clean up any mess before she does. Practice uncommon cleanliness and watch the difference it makes in a relationship.
Simple Secret # 7 Pay Attention Men true romance has nothing to do with flowers or candy at all. In fact true romance can be summed up in one simple phrase. To women, true romance means simply that as a boyfriend or husband are proactively meeting her unspoken needs. Serious about keeping the fire burning in your relationship? Become a student of that woman. Is she concerned about her weight. Why not invest in one of the many diet programs like,.ReviewofMedifast.com and participate with her. Discover all over again what she likes and doesn't like. Go to a restaurant and order a meal along with desert for her without her being there to tell you what she wanted? As a child what did she always want to be when she grew up? Really pay attention to her. Begin to listen and take notes if need be. Anticipate her needs, lighten her load and tell her how special she is. Do this and guarantee that the fire will continue to burn in long after Valentines Day.
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